well, been home since Friday! Work tomorrow until Friday and I cant wait for Saturday to see everyone :) Miss my buds!
It’s mad that when things don’t go to plan, how much more I miss people who aren’t here anymore! If only I could hear her voice again, have a chat, tell her it all! 10 years this year & I genuinely don’t know how I’ve done it. I miss her :(
Feeling terribly poorly..and its not due to alcohol :(
I wish I’d be able to catch a break. So tieed but too much on my mind to sleep!! I hate this.
Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone,
Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone,
Silence the pianos and with muffled drum
Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come.
Let aeroplanes circle moaning overhead
Scribbling on the sky the message He Is Dead,
Put crepe bows round the white necks of the public doves,
Let the traffic policemen wear black cotton gloves.
He was my North, my South, my East and West,
My working week and my Sunday rest,
My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song;
I thought that love would last for ever: I was wrong.
The stars are not wanted now: put out every one;
Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun;
Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood.
For nothing now can ever come to any good.
W. H. Auden
Pissed off is not the word!! Rather confused by how people act, if I say I really dislike someone or can’t deal being around them, I actually don’t bother with them, funnily enough I thought that was the logical thing to do? Obviously not now. When people now seem to feel like this, they spend even more time with people! Stupid if you ask me.
But this is what I’m going to work on, not keeping my mouth shut (because that is NEVER going to happen) but letting things like this go. It doesn’t affect me directly and at the point when it does, that’s when I’m just gunna ignore things.
In the meantime I’m going to concentrate on me. I always help other people with their problems, or issues in their lives. But when it comes to me? Well it’s still about them. So 2013 is going to be the year that I am selfish, I concentrate on my own happiness and how to keep myself happy. After all, we all know that life’s too short to be grumpy and angry all the time. I’m not saying I never will be like that, but things need to change. I need to change. I need to be properly happy rather than “lets-ignore-everything-and-pretend-i-am” happy.
Genuinely hate how some people can be.. the way they talk about things and the way they think i care!